Simon Ager sum et ab origine Lancastriensi in septentrionali parte Angliae. Nunc in Bangertio Cambriae habito. Negotium meum Omniglot.
In copia terrarum laboravi (in Britanniarum Regno, in Francia, et in Taivania, etc.), peragendi negotiolis variis laboravi.
Diu studium linguae, me tenuerunt. Mea lingua nativa Anglica, at in ludo Francogallicam et Germanicam, in academia Sinicam et Iaponicam studui, et me multas alias docui. Doctior lingua Sinensis Mandarinica quam aliis linguis. Cambriana, Hibernica, Francogallica, Theodisca, Hispanica, et Iaponica, in illo ordine sequuntur.
Nunc Armoricanam, et Russianam studio. Simulque facere scientiam meam Cambrianae, Hibernicae, et Gadelicae Scoticae linguae meliorem, et recipere meam antiquam fluentiam quae quondam mihi fuit Francogallica, Theodisca, et Iaponica lingua conor.
Pluria de meis facinoribus pulcherrimis linguis discendis.
Gaudeo etiam legendo, auscultando musicam, spectando pelliculas, canendo fidibus variis, canendo mea voce, peregrinando, labendo rotulis rectis, vehendo birota, vehendo unirota, et agendo praestigias, et varia alia cerrita ludi.
Si forte scire volebas, cognomen meum enunciator, Ager, ut /’eiga/(/’Ig@/). Videtur tractum esse e Saxonico nomine Ēadgār - "ēad" significat "prosperitas, fortuna", et "gār" significat "hasta".
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Translated into Latin by Andrew Kuhry-Haeuser of the Carmenta Online Latin Classroom
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